How to Settle a Dispute in Relationships

 

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Before I start sharing my thoughts on the subject, let me tell you that I’m neither a relationship guru, nor do I own a degree in psychology or human behavior. I am a learner myself and I learn with experiences like any other person. We have all been there — in the midst of an argument in a relationship.  We can, however, not deny that relationships are beautiful, aren’t they?

A relationship is just like a boat, which requires an equal amount of effort from all its passengers to row it to reach the shore. You can’t leave it midway, can you? Even if one person gives up, the other takes up the baton, compensating on his behalf, to keep the boat sailing.

Every human is of a different nature. Despite the variations, one must know how to stick to a relationship, just like the five fingers on each of our hands. They differ in size yet stay together and accidentally if one gets hurt, the entire hand feels the pain. It is human nature to feel the urge to communicate with fellow beings. Everyone has the ability to think, opine and agree or disagree to a situation or dialogue. This might lead to several complexities or disputes at times. What is important is to settle an argument and get back to normal in no time.

I know it is not an easy job and there are several hindrances to it like a big fat ego and momentary hatred coming in your way, poisoning your mind with all the negativity. But, stop not!

  • Communicate, communicate and communicate – The more you try to do that, the greater are the chances to settle things soon. Communication is the key to any disturbed relationship. Communicate to understand the problem. If you do not communicate now, no one would ever do it for you. And, even if somebody does, it is not going to help. Consider as if it is the last chance to mend things. Weigh what is more important: Ego or Relationship
  • Vent out your Anger – Anger is a very strong emotion. If you are angry at the person, vent it out. You cannot live with it anyway. Moreover, you are not the person who gets angry on every Tom, Dick and Harry. Right? Let the other person know how strongly you feel for him and that you are hurt. All you need to remember is where to draw a line. Keep your anger under control and do not intend to harm anyone with your words or actions.
  • Get your message across – After all, that is what the fight is all about. If this is the crux of any dispute, why not do it tactfully, soberly and giving a chance to your counterpart to present his thoughts as well. Would not it be great if all disputes turn into a noble conversation ending up in a win-win situation? Of course, it is possible. Give the other person a chance to speak. You have to be patient.
  • Think of the good times – Of all the moments, remember the time when you laughed together, chit chatted for hours or the late night conversations, had done something adventurous or naughty –think, think! This is just a passing phase. What is going to stay are the good old memories that bring a smile to your face, even if you do not wish to see the person’s face. Talk of the good times—yes, you can.
  • Take a deep breath, go for a coffee – Giving a break to the conversation that you feel can result into a heated argument, takes away or at least reduces the chances of getting into one. Take your partner for a cup of coffee, a long drive, for a walk, or shopping. Change the topic subtly, ask for discussing it later. During this period, try having a light-hearted conversation and deviating from the stress. Once you are back, you would no more feel like getting back into the discussion and so would be your partner.

You do not need to try them all. I am sure that your one move would make a lot of difference. It takes ages to build a relationship and a dispute is enough to do all the damage.  Let there be no space for it. Relationships are fragile, handle them with care. I am sure you will.

 

Anupriya Mishra is a writer, an independent blogger, a voracious reader and a freelance journalist. Truly in love with life, she wishes to celebrate each day by contributing to her blog. Her passions such as reading, writing, traveling, and photography have their unending space on the blog, which is a true reflection of her personality. She calls herself, “Wanderer by choice, Writer by passion.” To know more about her travel escapades, take a look at the “Travel & Living” section of the blog. Moreover, she conducts reviews of books, movies, hotels and restaurants. She also has a penchant for Fashion, Lifestyle, Events, Promotions, Books, Music, Features and Poems, all of which find space on the blog.


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